A writer with a blank paper!

A pen is in my hand and a blank paper on the table. I am trying my best to get an idea from my mind, so that I can write something; as it has been a long time since I wrote something in my blog for the last time.  I know you people always believe me, still if  you do not; then do believe me when I am saying that I am screwed up with life and career in such a way that my mind is not working the way I want it to do. So I am going to do the same thing; which I always do when my mind does not work properly. When my mind stops working, then I let my heart take control over my mind.

As today is my heart’s day; so today I will try to write something from my heart. But here comes the big question “What will I write?” If I will try to write something in order to try and bring a change to the world, to the society, to the country, to the person; will that work? To be honest; I do not think so. Before me lots of other brilliant writers tried their best to do the same with their words; but it did not work. So how can a person like me; who is not even sure if he is a writer, can bring a change by holding a pen in his hand and some thoughts in his mind.

Then, what will I write? My friends tell that, all my writings contain emotions and honesty which helps a person to get connected with them.Yes even I know that, I am honest. But I am not sure, if life will let me stay honest. I started realizing that, adulthood being responsibility to a person. And I can also say you with my own experience that, it not only increases the responsibility, but also increases the demands. It may be from a relationship, it may be from the job, it may be from family; the demands keep on increasing with each passing day. So in order to meet the demands I am afraid if life will not take my honesty away from me. After all result is what it matters; intention and labor hardly matters.

And yes, I am emotional; but I do not really count it among my strengths; I consider it as a weakness of mine. May be my biggest weakness! Like all intelligent people, I also understand that, “If you do not want to get hurt, then do not expect anything from anybody”. But like every human being, I really expect something from those people whom I love, care. I know it’s a mistake; but still that’s the sign of a human being. If I will do everything right then I will be God. And I am not God.  But it really hurts, when a person realize that,  he chose wrong peoples as companions in this journey of life. But after all they are also human beings, so they can’t also do everything right in life. So with time, they will also realize that, they do not have the emotions of a human in them, which is their biggest weakness. So I do not think there is any point in defining those emotions with words like love, hurt, pain, anger, joy, sorrows, and frustrations.

Then my heart is asking me, if I will write a love story. But what’s the point in writing it, if we can experience it by our own. We all fall in love, we all know what love is all about, we all know how love can be both constructive and destructive simultaneously just like fire, we all know love can be both beautiful and painful. We all know love can make life either heaven or hell. Then what is something new about love, which I can write? The answer is very simple, “Nothing”.

I know I can’t change anything or anybody with my words. If I will write something good, I will get some appreciation from you all wonderful people and I will get satisfied thinking that, one day I may be a writer. Or else you people are going to ignore it, and then I will get hurt thinking that, I can never be a writer.

But do really words has that much power in them to bring a change. We enjoy when we read a beautiful love story. We find tears in our eyes if the ending is a sad one. But in reality we never try to realize, someone loves us a lot; rather we search for a person whom we can love and then we expect that same love in return. We never realize that love is unconditional. We can’t ask for the same amount of love in return.

When someone writes about a old lady staying alone, with all the troubles and no one to help. We feel sad for her. But does this really enough for her. Is not it our duty to see, if any old person in our neighborhood or locality is alone and need someone?  Why we expect someone else to ask us for help, can’t we help that person by our own?

Words can do nothing except wasting few more papers directly and few more trees indirectly; until and unless we will change. I know today was not my day. I did not write something excellent. But there is always tomorrow. I will again try to write something good, and yes with my mind working properly. I know today is same as yesterday; but with the hope that tomorrow there will be a change for good in this world and we will bring it, I am saying you “Good Bye” for now

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43 thoughts on “A writer with a blank paper!

  1. Arindam, my friend, your heart pours out in this piece and I can’t decide what to comment on. Love is heaven and hell; well, we need to find our closest proximity to heaven — head that way and hope.

    Can your words change the world? Maybe. Or maybe you can convince yourself to do something better for the world. Or maybe, maybe, you can convince me. Or all of us.

    Life is never an easy journey, but mostly you have found a way forward through your writing and through your contributions (and I am sure they exist even if today you are not seeing them). Keep thinking of the little and big things that you are doing, that you can do tomorrow and you will get beyond the helpless feeling i perceived here.

    1. First of all, Happy Birth Day to you Elyse. :)
      How can you give such a nice comment without even deciding what to comment on. :) May be this is the example of what writing can do. Few words from you, brought a smile on my face.
      And yes I will keep on thinking and doing all those things, what ever I am doing now. At least I will try to do these things.

  2. Once you start writing, the words come. :) For your life and career, I will pray that you become what you were born to be. There is a purpose for you, for wanting to write and share. It doesn’t always have to be something new, or something never done before. Writing from one’s heart strikes a chord in the hearts of others, and we realize that we are more alike than we think. Or, we are not the only person who feels this way, we are not alone, there are others out there going through the same trials we face. As to your comment about helping an elderly lady: yes, maybe you can help the one on your block, but by bringing their plight to bear, others may begin to see those on their block have a need they can fulfill. Be the spark, Arindam, that lights the way for others.

    1. Thank you Patti for the prayer! I will try to be the spark for sure. Yes all of us born to do something unique. But it all depends on the circumstances and chances life gives us.
      I always write from heart; sometimes I failed to do as i fall short of words to describe what my heart want to say. I also hope it strikes a chord in the heart of others.
      It was all my pleasure to read this thoughtful comment of yours. Best wishes to you. :)

  3. Writer’s block, eh? A mentor has once told me if again I get writer’s block, might as well write about it. And you just did. And who said this is not something excellent? Then again, I guess we are our own worst critic. Nonetheless, I enjoyed reading this post.

    1. Did you really find it excellent! :) If so then let me know, I will be really happy to hear that. :)
      And yes, we are our own critic. And may be we criticize ourselves too harshly. But that is the only way we can grow.
      I am glad you liked this post Addie. Thank you!

  4. Ahh, writer’s block. If you recall recently, I ran into writer’s block myself and even though some might consider writer’s block a failure, I wrote “I Have Writer’s Block So I’m Just Going to Say It”, and I think it turned out just fine. Despite the fact I tried in vain to deliver a masterpiece of sorts, I failed, but I still got my message across.

    I find you did the same thing Arindam. To you this post might mean nothing, but to your readers, this is just another excellent post from one of our favorite writers.

    1. Thanks a lot Joe for your unconditional support, as always. It may make you laugh, but let me say that, I was not aware of something like “Writer’s block” exist. I did not even know its meaning. But after I post this one, so many of you referred to this term “Writer’s block”; then i came to know what does it mean. :)
      I hope I do not have to stay for a long time in this “Writer’s Block:”! :)

  5. “What has been will be again, what has been done will be done again; there is nothing new under the sun.”

    That’s from the bible (Ecclesiastes). It’s exactly what you were writing about. BUT, does that mean that love should not occur, songs left unwritten, novels not penned, buildings left unbuilt ? We still have to try to put our fingerprints on life – and each of us has a very distinct imprint. Thank you for your unique mark on life, Arindam!

    1. You mentioned a beautiful quote from bible. It’s so true. But I still can’t understand, why we can’t write something new, something extraordinary that can bring a change. People say words have that much power. But till now, i can’t agree with them that words can bring a change. We only flow with the emotions & thought of a poet or writer until we are reading his/her writings. Once it get over, we come back to our own world and limit ourselves with in a small radius, which we call as home. And rather than thinking about all, we only think about ourselves.
      As always thank you for this inspiring comment Mj. :)

  6. Arindam, no worries! Pay heed to Robert Benchley’s wise words: ‘It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn’t give it up because by that time I was too famous.’
    So Mr Famous, one never knows! Just keep on writing…and listening to your heart.. :)

    1. Your Mr Famous made me laugh Mal. :) Are you serious about that one? :)
      Jokes apart, I never heard these wise words of Robert Benchley. But I love this quote. And I will keep on writing, as long as people like you are there, who can inspire me in this journey.

  7. Arindam, we forget the powers of love, both old and new, at our peril. The world will always be a better place for the stories of love. Happy writing, you will have good days and others . . . keep it up and I will keep reading, and enjoying! Thank you!

  8. Hi Arindam, there are two things I hope for you after reading this post:

    1. That you never underestimate the power of the written word.

    It is our most important, longest lasting way to make an impression on the world. To measure the world, and by doing so, to measure ourselves. To impart some piece of knowledge others may never have learned. You have the Stop Censorship badge up on your site (as do I), so I know you understand this. But I hope you give yourself the same courtesy you’re supporting for so many others, and realize that by writing, you are doing something good. Which takes me to point two:

    2. That you believe you are a writer.

    I thought we’d been through this! :) Guess it didn’t stick. I understand how hard it must be for you to accept this, entirely, as you are a computer guy. And maybe you’ve never had your work published other than on your blog. But that doesn’t mean you are not a writer. It just may mean it’s harder for you to accept that truth. I guess as your friend I would say, “Accept it or not, but you are a writer.”

    You know my background. I’ve been published, I’ve been on television, I’ve been a reporter, I’ve been an editor — I’ve seen so many different styles and types of writing. I point this out because you are an engineer. So maybe you need some cold hard facts to believe in yourself. Writers come in all forms. Take it from one writer to another: welcome to the club.

    PS — as per my usual, here’s my favorite line from this post, “But in reality we never try to realize, someone loves us a lot; rather we search for a person whom we can love and then we expect that same love in return.” Beautifully Written.

    1. Melissa, I know I can’t argue with anything you wrote. So I think it will be better for me to just listen and remember whatever you said. :)
      So two things I realized & going to remember after reading this comment of yours are-
      1. I am not going to underestimate the power of the written word.
      2. I will believe that, I am a writer. (I hope you are serious while saying this :) )

      But am I the same Arindam you are talking about! :) Jokes a part, your this comment made my day. I will remember this one forever.
      Thank you Melissa for being such a wonderful & supportive friend. :)

  9. Even when you say you are writing about nothing, you are writing about so many things. Every one of us has had the experience of being blocked or feeling like we aren’t making a difference – a huge impetus to write in the first place. I feel like you worked through your blockage just fine and produced a lovely piece of work.

    1. Thank you Renee. :) This was a post I just wrote without having any specific thought in my mind. I just went with the flow. I am really happy hearing that you liked this one.

  10. Great post, I enjoyed reading your reflections and thoughts about yourself! I think you came up with a pretty good post considering you didn’t know what to write about at first! :)

  11. Your “Heart Writing” is unique in itself. People want words that touch their emotions, soooo the very thing that you feel is a weakness is what works for others.

    Blessings – Maxi

    1. Thanks a lot Barb. :) I am glad that, I could fill the blank paper with words. And yes I always stay in touch with my heart, but sometimes It’s hard to decide if I would bring those thoughts out or not.

  12. I love your honesty. But I also think you are wrong in some sense. Words do change. Most importantly they change your own perspective. By formulating what you believe in, what the heart tells you, you refine your own thinking, and you will little by little understand more and more. And through that you will also be able to change others. So keep writing, even when it feels less than satisfactory. Let you heart out, and things will move for you. Yes, as we grow older there will be more demands on us, but then it’s even more important to stay honest. The world needs honest people – more than ever. So keep writing, even when you feel empty – the words will eventually come, if you don’t force it. And I know it’s nice to get assurance from others, but the creative process is in itself the reason – not the recognition from others. But I still want to be honest with you: You are a good writer – and you have important issues you bring up. Keep at it!

    1. Thank you. Yes I will surely remember what ever you said. And I will completely agree with you, that words change a person’s own perspective. At least it happened with me. May be I am not matured enough to realize that words change, so it will be better for me to go with intelligent, matured & talented person like you.

      And lastly, your honesty while saying, “I am a good writer”, is something that made my day, and it will boost my confidence for sure. Yes, I will try to bring important issues with my writings in coming days.

  13. Even on your bad day, you have said some profound things in this post. Like the line Melissa pointed out. I agree with Munchow’s comment. The process of ‘writing’ is as helpful as the feedback one gets. Keep at it!

  14. Arindam, as so many others have said, even when you think you have nothing to say, you say it so beautifully, and so honestly, that it speaks to all of us. You excel at pointing out the common ties that bind us all – our fragile emotions, our humanity. Thank you for sharing this post about nothing – It proved to be about so much more.

    1. Thanks a lot Christal, for these kind words. These words means a lot, as these came from an intelligent person life you. :)
      It was among those days, when I wanted to write without even knowing what I’d write. But I went with the flow, and tried to bring those random thoughts, which came to mind that day. I am really glad you liked it.

  15. Somehow you wrote something today that came across as honest and moving. And it’s okay to be emotional. I think it makes us more caring about others, making us more sensitive to the needs of those around us. To me, that’s way better than being cold( some dudes think they are cool by trying to be cold and emotionally detached). You are at the right path. You a gift of words for someone so young. And yes, not everyone can write like you…kudos.
    Hope you like the “HUG” award…http://thismansjourney.net

    1. Thanks bro. Thank you for the “HUG” award. More than the award, the comment made my day. I could not ask for a better response to my writing. After reading so many posts of you, I feel, you are also emotional like me. So thanks for not letting me alone in this path. I know you will always be there to motivate me and inspire me through your words. :) As always best wishes to you & your whole family bro.

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